Happy Birthday, Harry Potter!

You know, every time I come on this thing, I realize how amazingly witty and clever I really am. Then I ask myself, Why don't I write on here more often?

Oh, yeah...I'm not really witty or clever. I think I steal most of my smart stuff. If you're laughing, I probably copied it off of Seinfeld.

Anyway. Celebrated Harry Potter's birthday today. I think he's the same age as me, technically (but who's technical?) Rommel and I went to see Harry Potter 6. Rather enjoyable, I thought. Probably because it's been over a year since I've read the books, and thus, and I can't quote word for word every conversation. I used to be able to do that, believe it or not. I'm a freakin' Harry Potter genius, I'm telling you.

Also, since I was in charge of Storytime at Barnes and Noble, we celebrated there too. I read "Magic Box", and had each of the kids make a magic wand. Hugely successful. Afterward, I taught them all to say "Wingardium Leviosa!" and then would pretend I saw books flying around. They'd get all excited and look around. It was so cute.

And do you realize how expensive movies have gotten? How ridiculous is that?

Twenty Things I Learned at College

1. Just because someone hates me because of my religion doesn't make them a bad person.
2. Choosing to study rather than go out with friends means you'll have good grades in a major you hate and no appearances in your friends's photo albums.
3. Sentimentality is okay--in small doses.
4. "You can do anything you want" is the stupidest thing you could tell someone. "You can do anything you want more than anything--and I do mean ANYTHING--in the world" is more accurate.
5. Money should be as important as it is. No more, no less.
6. Being married made me a better student, not a worse one.
7. Snow sucks.
8. Sometimes dreams do come true, and it usually happens when the dreams you thought you had fall apart.
9. When a woman gets her degree and then becomes a mother, it makes her a better mother, not a worse feminist.
10. I'm not exceptional, and that's finally okay.
11. I can handle stressful situations.
12. Yes, high school did matter--when I was there. But I'm so glad it doesn't matter now.
13. Professors are just people.
14. God won't magically help me choose the right answer if I didn't study or make my paper write itself. But I know he's on my side, even if it's because of something as small as a parking spot in front or a sunny day or a friend giving me a muffin. And if God is on my side, the my team isn't doing too badly.
15. Dr. Seuss is the greatest literary genius of all time.
16. Love isn't a feeling, or an event, or an action. Many days, it's a decision.
17. Sometimes it's important to pay attention to the person you were when you were 5. She may know more about you than you do.
18. Doing your best isn't always good enough.
19. You have to love what you're doing, or you'll never do it well.
20. Just being me is enough.

Things Everyone Else Seems to Love and I Don't Care About

Here is a list of things that everyone else "oohs" and "aahs" about and I couldn't care less about.

1. The view from the top of a mountain. I'm too miserable and hot and bug bitten when I get there to care about what the world looks like. Let someone else take a picture for me, I'll look at that.
2. American Idol- It's glorified karaoke, people.
3. Sirloin steak - It's okay.
4. The Superbowl- It's a game.
5. Uggs and Crocs- Crocs are plastic, aren't your feet sweaty?
6. Fake nails- I never needed them, and my natural nails are prettier.
7. Country dancing- it's boring.
8. Skiing- No, I don't have an interest in taking my own life in my hands.
9. Minute details of President Obama's life and daily routine (no, I don't care what his aunt is doing, I don't care if his wife is planting a garden, and I don't care about the joke he made this morning. We're in an economic crisis and a war, newspapers. Don't you think there is something else that could take up this space?)
10. Expensive cars- the really souped-up cars just look stupid, and I'm pretty sure it means they're compensating for something.

Things I Thought I'd Hate But I Actually ADORE

Lately I've been thinking in lists... Don't know why. Here's one of them:

Things I Thought I'd Hate But I Actually ADORE

1. Sushi
2. Nintendo Wii and DS
3. Young Adult and Middle Grade novels (including The Giver...I didn't read it for years because of the stupid cover, and I finally forced myself and wow...amazing)
4. Writing Conferences
5. Being married (Tell my sixteen-year-old self that I'd get married at twenty, she'd knock you out)
6. Sundresses
7. Reading scriptures
8. Classical writers
9. Lingerie (it makes me feel sexy, okay? So maybe I'm not a Victoria's Secret model, I can pretend!)
10. Flip Flops

And all but two of these I didn't start until after I met Rommel...

Pediatric Audiology Presentation

I go in to Pediatric Audiology, totally stressed out. We have fifty slides, and forty minutes to present them. Then we had a quiz, which means we would only have thirty-five minutes to present, at best. I get one question into the quiz, and what happens? Fire alarms.

Yep. Some little kid set off the fire alarm. No real fire, which means we went back in after five minutes or so. Of course, that means we only had thirty minutes for fifty slides.

It's a good thing I talk so fast.

Here are a few of the comments from the other students in the class. I feel the need to post them, because it is so rare that I get compliments in anything.

"I liked how they elaborated after reading their slide. That to me showed that they had a high level of knowledge on their topic."

Ha! Little do they know I was making everything up!

"I like how they expanded on what was on each slide. I really liked the sign-language video. I found this information very interesting. They were professional, well dressed, and organized. Sometimes they talked a little fast, but it’s understandable because of the time constraint."

That's me, the fast talker. But I got us through everything with fifteen seconds to spare!

"Good balance of reviewing old information and incorporating new information. Included helpful visuals to illustrate information"

Yeah, you see, for someone like me that doesn't pay attention in any of her classes, it was all new information...I'm glad this person had heard of some of it before though...

And from the professor:
"You both did a great job. Content was relevant and your presented material was consistent with college seniors in this major. You went into good depth, given the time constraints, and I think class members received a good review of some information and gained new information and knowledge. Your presentation was well organized, clear, and concise. You defined terms and answered questions well. You both presented very well. Be careful with filler words and reading too much from the slides. You both spoke loudly and clearly. You were both professionally dressed. Overall, great job."

I definitely put in "ums" all the time. It's just the most natural sound when you're clicking for the next slide. But if that's the worst thing I do, I think I'm pretty well off. I'm just glad it's all over.

And I didn't get a parking ticket today! Yay!

Bottom of the Crop, Cream of the Barrel

So we went over that stupid test that I failed in class today. I'm tempted to put all the questions and answers on here, if I could only figure out how the linky thing works. Although I might get kicked out for that...I don't know. I don't think he'd have gone over the test if we weren't allowed to share the notes. Though I get the feeling he recycles questions.

Anyway, I'm getting off topic. The average score in the class was 81%. Two people got 100%. Now, we all know I'm pretty terrible at math, but I'm pretty sure that means that I had one of the lowest grades in the class. Surprise! Not everyone failed. Just me.

To quote Shrek, "I need something deep fried and smothered in chocolate."

Wanting to pay attention in class, and not being able to

So, I failed the Speech Science test. Yep. 63%.

You know, (warning, I feel a rant coming on) I'm so sick of my self-esteem teetering on how well I do on tests about topics that do nothing to help me. These classes are not beneficial to me. They are teaching me nothing that I care to know. Or need to know. I will never need to know whether a FFT would show harmonic peaks or fundamental frequencies or a clown smoking weed with Michael Phelps. It doesn't matter, and I don't care. And I shouldn't have to feel bad about myself because I don't know it.

I think I came closer to a mental breakdown in the Testing Center than I ever have in my life. I know I say that all the time, but I really do mean it. I panicked, I really did. Air raced in and out my lungs at about the same speed as my heartbeat, which rivaled a psycho woodpecker. I was certain that I was going to faint. The words sort of swirled around, I know now what it's like to be dyslexic. I couldn't read, I could barely see, and I was positive that I would fail. Which I did. Self-fulfilling prophecy? Probably. But what else could I do? I had to get out of that place. I answered what I could and guessed on what I couldn't. I've never been a good guesser.

I wish I could feel some inspiration to write. That would soothe me, I think.

I'm kind of tired of titles

Do I have anything to talk about today? Not really. I changed one of my other blogs to a book review blog. See, some editors said that you need to have a blog if you want to get published. Well, I have three, but none of them had anything to do with writing. So I changed one of them to be a book review. Should be interesting. I don't know if anyone will read it. But no one reads this one, either, and I don't let that stop me.

I've been daydreaming an awful lot today. That probably makes me sort of weird. I have all these imaginary conversations, and then, when I have a real conversation, it just doesn't compare.

Listening to some of the things that people talk about in my language disorder classes make me realize that I would be a terrible speech-language pathologist. Good thing I learned early on that I didn't want to do that. And listening to horror stories about lawsuits in my audiology classes make me realize that I don't care about the ear enough to do a really good job on anyone. Good thing I'm not going to do that either.

However, hearing about how the economy is going to get worse before it gets better makes me realize I should have chosen a major that would help me to get a job. I wish there was something about me that makes me invaluable to the work force. *sigh*

Parking Tickets Must Die

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I got a parking ticket on Friday for doing a good deed. Wrong zone. Stupid BYU parking police came five minutes (literally!) before I got to the car.

And today, I got a second parking ticket. This time, it's because BYU refuses to provide enough parking for all the students, forcing me to park on the street. I checked to make sure that it wasn't a red zone, but unfortunately, due to the snow that covered everything, I failed to notice the sign that was too covered up to read anyway which said that I was in a no parking zone between 8-4. I was just trying to go to a class that I hate anyway. Thanks, City of Provo. Everyone knows you hate students, well guess what. If we all disappeared, you would die. We're the reason this ridiculous little city functions.

So now, all the money that I've been diligently saving for Rommel's birthday on the 9th will now go to paying parking tickets. Yeah, I'm not going to lie, I was crying when I got that second one. I have no idea where the money will come from now. My meager paycheck has already been cut down because of all the holidays I was forced to take (Stupid New Years. Stupid MLK day. Who decided that these were holidays? And who decided that people can't go to work on holidays they don't believe in?). And I'm still trying to recover from tuition and books and Christmas. I've taken every opportunity to try to come early and stay late at work, and yet still, the nickels and dimes are not adding up.

I know, I know, it's not about the money, it's about being together, and it's the thought that counts, blah blah blah. But he works so hard to take care of me, and he does so much for me, and this is the one day of the year that can just be all about him. We don't have to deal with families or friends or Hallmark or commercialism. And I don't have anything to show him how much I love him and appreciate him. And the reason why? Because BYU and the city of Provo have no mercy.

I really need something to cheer me up. I wish I had some See's Candies.

I think I have the beginnings of a headache

So I had nightmares all night about my stupid lesson tomorrow. It was awful. And then I got up and looked at all the notes that I made on it already, and I hate them all. They didn't work out so well in the dream, and so I'm convinced they won't work now. Irrational, I know. That's the way my brain works.

I'm pretty sure I'll do the stupid, cliche Jeopardy thing. I just can't come up with anything else. I'm not cut out to be a Sunday School teacher. It's so...fact-based. And when you put a bunch of BYU students in a room with a bunch of facts, they just want to screw them all up. *sigh*

I finished reading Shannon Hale's The Goose Girl today. One of my new favorite books of all time. I loved it. She has such a melodic rhythm to her writing, it really does feel like you're lying in a warm bed, hearing your mother read you fairy tales. I can't get the book out of my mind. It reminds me of the first time I ever heard Sleeping Beauty or Rapunzel. I feel like a kid all over again, just waiting to become a princess. I want to be a princess.

And I don't know why Princess Academy got Newbery Honor and this one didn't. It really should have, it was better than Princess Academy. Don't get me wrong, I liked it, but The Goose Girl is a hundred times better.

Everything I see today seems to be talking about pie. I want some pie.

The Inside of My Ear Itches

But I can't scratch it because of all the horror stories I've heard from my Audiology classes. Like the one lady who was scratching the inside of her ear with a bobby pin and her daughter opened the door without knowing she was behind it and she jammed the bobby pin right through her eardrum. Ick.

So I'm not going to lie to you. I just don't want to do my homework. Or get my lesson ready for Sunday. Wow, I get so scared every time I think about that. I just know I'm going to do something stupid. I always do. I shouldn't be allowed to speak in public.

I got a parking ticket today. That sucks. I was working, for heaven's sake! But I don't know if I want to fight it, I doubt they'll accept that as an excuse. I hate the BYU parking police people.

I'm really sick of all the telemarketing calls. We unlisted our number, shouldn't they stop calling? It's so annoying. I can't understand why they're wasting their time with newlywed students. Who has less money than our demographic?

You know, Mary Kate and Ashley used to be so adorable. "You got it, dude!" Other than them, Full House is pretty uninteresting. Cheesy and without personality. The girls are snotty little brats, I can't imagine my parents letting me say things like that to them. And the three men have no personality at all. I do like Lori Loughlin, though, even if they do suck all the personality out of her in that show. Hmm.

Unfortunately, I think this is about as far as I can drag this one out.

My First Real Post

So, everything prior to this was done for an assignment, no need to pay any attention to it. I sort of miss the days when we turned in a paper or something for school. No, now we have to create blogs and update them every week with our assignments. I think teachers just don't want to have to deal with paper anymore. Stupid anti-papites.
As you can probably tell by now, I have nothing of interest to say today. Class is just super boring and I have nothing better to do.